Buying a Home Is Like Falling in Love

Buy Right

My Secrets for Buying a Home

Buying a home for the first time can be confusing. That’s why the tips and strategies you’ll find in my 8-week series will set you on the right path. It’s my unique approach and a “behind the scenes” glimpse of what you should look out for and consider when starting your search for a home.

You can feel the attraction immediately and imagine a picture-perfect life together for many years ahead. You’ve fallen hard, very hard ….

But wait! We’re not talking about your latest date but rather a home you saw while house hunting.

Yes, buying a home is like falling in love.

You can expect to go through the same ups and downs, emotional tugs and pulls, and even similar stages:

Being smitten, getting your heart broken, eventually learning from your mistakes, and becoming wiser and more serious on your quest for “love.”

All is fair in love and war … and house hunting! We’ll show you how to make the most of your journey in finding a home you love.

The One that Got Away

Everyone remembers the devastation of their first heartbreak. You feel a sense of loss, guilt, and extreme emotions about what you may or may not have done wrong.

Guess what? Buyers have that too.

Sometimes you have to lose out on a property you love before you can get serious (and braver) about home buying. Here’s what you can learn from going through this disappointment:

Don’t hesitate about your true feelings and be wishy-washy about your intentions.

What this means as a buyer: Once you’ve become a serious buyer, you must be ready to put a competitive offer in right away and be the utmost prepared with your maximum budget, financing, deal-breakers. This experience forces you to gain some additional self-awareness on what is important to you in a home, why you want to become a homeowner, and that you’ve got to open yourself up to negotiation and strategic tactics to seal the deal! You’ve got to get this point BEFORE you begin house hunting.

Learn to move on and keep searching.

What this means as a buyer: Use those feelings of regret as an advantage, and turn them into a positive. You now are a wiser, more seasoned buyer who better understands how the housing market works in that particular neighborhood and price range. Don’t waste time wallowing; dust yourself off and keep looking at homes since new inventory and listings will come on the market.

Don’t look back and don’t compare.

What this means as a buyer: What happens if you can’t get that master suite bathroom out of your mind from that last home? Or that fabulous deck? You could go on and on comparing your first heartbreak with other houses. Stop. It. Immediately.  Go back and focus on your original list of must-haves, deal-breakers, needs, and wants. Or tweak it if anything has changed and get back out there!

Don’t worry; you will fall in love again.

What this means as a buyer: Yes, you will find a home and be happy! Most buyers get over their heartbreak and find a home that works for them and their families.  Sometimes the struggle will be worth it, and you’ll end up with a home that is the perfect match for you.

Hopelessly Devoted to That Home

Do you believe in love at first sight? Or maybe have fallen in love with someone who might not have been the right choice.

Blinded by love or even desperation, we ignore any signs that this isn’t the one really for us.

The same thing can happen to homebuyers.  You could fall in love with a home or location that isn’t a good match for you and your family.

Unfortunately, some buyers can get swayed by emotion and start to make irrational decisions, especially if a hectic housing market is causing them anxiety. 

Don’t be a fool in love. Some buyers get hung up on a fantastic or gorgeous home that wows them … but it really doesn’t fit their family’s needs at all (i.e., long commute to work, not enough bedrooms, too small or too big, too expensive, etc.).

Never settle for what doesn’t feel right.  Some buyers end up with a home that isn’t good enough for them. Yes, home buying does require some compromise, but this refers to ignoring blatant issues with a home that could cause regret later on. For example, they didn’t carefully consider some red flags about the home’s structure, quality, etc. This can happen when buyers want a house so badly in a particular neighborhood.

It’s times like this that you need to search for some clarity on your part to avoid falling too hard for the wrong home, whether you’re charmed by it or know it’s a dud.

Fall in Love with the Right Home

You can fall in love with a home that works for you, for most of your needs, for your budget, and your lifestyle. Buying a home is full of emotion, and keeping your heart and head in sync can save you a lot of heartache down the road.

Get your priorities straight. We can’t stress this enough but make a list of your must-haves and deal-breakers and stick to it! Don’t be lured by a “hot” looking home when all it might lead to heartbreak down the road for short-term bliss.  

Know what’s best for you. Only you know what will work for you and your family. It’s your life, so don’t listen or be swayed by what your friends have to say.  Keep your emotions in check as much as possible and make rational and intelligent decisions based on what is best for you and your family.

We hope you’ve enjoyed this series, “My Secrets to Buying Your First Home.” We’ve got more hints and tips coming your way! Stay tuned in each week as we discuss more topics that will help you on your home-buying journey.


I'm Tehane, a local realtor helping locals buy, sell, and stay local in Honolulu  Schedule a conversationand let's talk about your current situation and where you want to be. Then, let's create a plan to get you there.  Every journey begins with the first step! 



BHGRE Advantage Realty
4211 Waialae Avenue, Box 9050
Honolulu, HI. 96816


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Let's connect


I'm Tehane, a local realtor helping locals buy, sell, and stay local in Honolulu. Schedule a conversation, and let's talk about your current situation and where you want to be. Then, let's create a plan to get you there. Every journey begins with the first step!   

Let's connect 

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